hilary [week 4]: valentine's day

A month has passed since I last saw my fiancée Lisa. I actually think that we've handled being apart much better than expected. Unlike some other couples where MBA really stands for "Married, But Available," Lisa and I have kept focused on what's really important to us: our wedding later this year, and making lots of money!

I attribute our success to several factors. We Skype almost every night. We constantly send little "pings" back-and-forth between our iPhones during the day. It also helps that I'm constantly distracted by studying, applying for jobs, and participating in extra-curriculars (e.g. student government, finance club, and rowing). Although I can't speak for Lisa, I imagine that it helps that she's working full-time, and has her family nearby.

That being said, at least half of MBAs decide to bring their significant other with them. There exists a strong support network here at Oxford for couples and families. But regardless of the level of support, I've noticed two things. First, there is a difference between married couples with kids, and those without. The two groups tend to "hang-out" in different circles, which is fine, because there's plenty of both to go around. Second, I observe that to keep the relationship healthy the spouse MUST find some kind of work, whether paid or unpaid (volunteer work). This can be complicated because of work visa issues, but I think that if someone wanted to, they could always find a job labeling Darwin's butterflies at the Oxford Museum of Natural History.

It also helped tremendously to make special visits every so often to see one another. This Valentine's Day Lisa flew to Oxford to see me. I picked-her up at the airport, and after spending one night at my college accommodations ("The Exeter Estate & Gardens"), we spent the weekend at the Randolph Hotel. The Randolph normally costs £215 per night minimum, but they have a special arrangement with SBS where they charges £150 per night, and this includes a hot breakfast. This amounts to a significant 30% in savings at one of the swankiest addresses in Oxford! In order to qualify for the discount, however, you have to coordinate with the front desk at SBS, which acts as a good safe-guard against non-MBAs qualifying for the discount.

Through the kind beneficense of our friends, Lisa and I enjoyed a sumptious dinner at the Christ Church Grand Dining Hall courtesy of Nisheeth, followed the next day by lunch at Lincoln College - thanks to Harpreet. We ended our vacation with Lisa's first Formal Hall dinner at Exeter College. We had a great time although the Valentine's Day vacation was too short to do much travelling outside Oxford. Especially because I had assignments due that Monday and Tuesday. At least Lisa gets to see that I really do work hard here. Enjoy the pics:

pre-mba: pre-departure planning

I can't believe how fast the time has gone! I remember flying to Oxford with my fiancee Lisa for my Round 2 interview back on February 20th. It seemed to take forever as I waited for their admission decision that was emailed to me on March 27th. After discussing the opportunity with Lisa, as well as with my friends and family, everyone agreed it was too good of an opportunity to pass up. It was also a dream come true, especially because I had studied abroad at Oxford in 2000 while an undergraduate. I remember walking to the train station with my sister to catch a train to Morton-in-the-Marsh in the Cotswolds, and passing by a construction site where the new Saïd Business School was being built. That day I pledged to myself to one day return, and to take a proper degree - that is, to be permanently etched into the matriculation books at Oxford.

Life, however, does not move in a perfectly linear fashion as economics might otherwise suggest. Undetered by what challenges life threw at me, I persevered, and after a lot of hard-work, can now count myself as one of the lucky ones who will earn an MBA from Oxford University. I use the term "lucky" loosely. Of course I believe that: success = preparation + opportunity, but just because you work hard doesn't mean that you're guaranteed anything; you just simply tip the probability for success in your favor.

Even probability is a relative term, however, as anyone who watches ESPN's "Texas Hold'em World Series of Poker" knows. Time and gain you see a player dealt "bullets" down (the best possible starting hand in poker), he bets strategically, and winds up "flopping" yet another Ace for "trip Aces". His probability for winning skyrockets to over 90%. Nothing else is showing on the green felt table except a scattered mess of cards, until the final card is revealed on the "river." Your opponent miraculously makes his "inside straight draw," and clutches victory from the jaws of defeat even though they should have folded at the get-go. Those challenges, and how you react to such an improbable defeat, reveals a person's character. At times like these you have to stick hard-and-fast to the belief that over time there will be a "reversion to the mean," and that your best bet is to continue to play the percentages. And have enough liquidity to see you through!

You might be surprised to learn that I actually don't watch much poker. I had too much other work to accomplish before leaving for Oxford! Most importantly, Lisa and I bought our plane tickets to Heathrow yesterday. Fares were up to $700 each round-trip on Virgin Atlantic from New York (JFK) to London Heathrow (LHR), compared to $500 when we last flew in February. We'll be arriving a week before mandatory MBA orientation, and a full two weeks before the start of Michaelmas term. This should give me ample time to open a bank account and buy a cell phone. We managed to get a reasonable £16 per night room through Exeter College. The next best price I found was £55 at the Saint Michael's Guess House (across from the Oxford Union) for a double room. Fancier places, like the Buttery on Broad Street and the Randolph Hotel on Beaumont Street, charge £120 and £156 per night for a double room, respectively! This should give you a good idea if and when you book temporary accommodations in Oxford (or have family visit).

The only other thing remaining is my Visa. I suggest that everyone stay on top of this early. I proactively requested my Visa letter by emailing the business school administration. I had a wonderful experience. Their turnaround time was top-rate, and they were extremely responsive to me. As soon as my "hard copy" arrived in early July, I booked an online appointment to get my biometric fingerprints taken at the closest US Federal Office to me in New York City. I had to wait nearly one month for an available appointment! I finally had my biometrics taken on August 19th, and immediately overnighted my entire Student Visa (Tier 4) application to the New York British Consulate. And I was thorough! You will want to include the following: Passport (original), Student Visa application (filled out and printed online), Biometric fingerprints (original), MBA Admission letter (original), Oxford College Admission letter (original), Proof of Oxford Housing Address, Student Transcripts (original), and Funding Documents (student loans, bank account balances, etc.). It took the British Consulate eleven days just to confirm by email that they had received my application, and would take a further 5 to 10 business days to process. I suppose this won't be too bad provided I get my Visa by next Friday.

My biggest recommendation would be to book your biometric appointment ASAP, and to put together a very complete and legible application (read above). I don't know how later Round applicants get this done in time since some aren't notified of their admission until July! Good luck, and feel free to write a comment if you have any problems/questions with preparing to move to Oxford.